This is a real letter from the Dear Abby advice column. The letter's not meant to be funny, but I find the reply is hilarious.
WOMAN'S SHOCKING DISCOVERY PUTS MAN IN UNMARKED GRAVE
DEAR ABBY: For 15 years I was a happily married homemaker with a wonderful husband. "Duncan" and I attended church together, frolicked through the fields, even exterminated rodents together. He was my best friend. It was bliss.Last year I found out my father had had an affair with Duncan's mother the year I was born, which makes him my half-brother! The news was too much for my husband. He had a fatal heart attack not long after.What should I put on his gravestone -- "Loving Brother" or "Loving Husband"? -- GRIEVING IN MASSACHUSETTS
DEAR GRIEVING: Neither. How about "He was 'Everything' to me"? That should about cover it.